Just about eighteen months ago, I decided to resign from my job to become a full-time stay-at-home parent to my daughter. I had held my position at that company for a good number of years and had ascended to a decently remunerative comfortable role, but I never truly derived joy from it. Over time, the job turned monotonous and dull, lacked intellectual simulation, and most significantly, greatly interfered with my precious moments with my daughter.
It pained me to leave her at a daycare every morning to commute to a job I didn’t find fulfilling. I had always envisioned myself being a full-time mother once I had my child, yet there I was, entrenched in an unfulfilling job that was eating into my quality time with my baby. It felt wrong on so many levels.
The heartache of leaving your teary-eyed child at the daycare, prying their clingy fingers off your clothes – it’s an atrocious feeling that ruins your day. Little ones truly want to spend time with their parents, and it feels unjust to barter your time with them simply to earn some extra cash.
Fortunately, we don’t have to live this way if it doesn’t suit us. You can take steps today to adjust your financial standing, allowing more valuable time with your kids during these precious years. If you’ve ever wondered whether you can afford to stay at home full-time, let’s explore four crucial aspects.
ONE: EXPERIMENT WITH LIVING ON A SINGLE INCOME
Thinking about managing things with a single income can be daunting. Hence, it’s advisable to give it a try before you actually quit your job. This way you’ll know if it’s feasible for your family. When I first toyed with the idea of being a full-time parent, we started with this experiment.
That meant living exclusively on my husband’s paycheck while depositing mine into a separate account. Yes, kick-starting this process was challenging and did throw up a few setbacks, but it’s far less risky when there’s a backup income.
Budgeting plays a crucial role here. We did tweak it a bit and gradually adapted to this new arrangement. We were forced to cut back on certain areas, but none of it was unbearable. In light of our new lifestyle, frugality seemed fair enough.
Please understand, every family is financially unique, what worked for us might not for you. Nonetheless, analyzing your expenses and trimming the unnecessary ones does lead to some revelations. Once accustomed to a single income, you can think of further steps.
TWO: BUILD A ROBUST EMERGENCY FUND
Fortunately, while we were still experimenting, we saved a fairly good amount of money forming our emergency fund. This fund acted as a comfortable economic cushion for us when I decided to leave my job.
A robust emergency fund is comforting and helps you sleep better at night, knowing there’s financial protection in place in case of unforeseen circumstances.
THREE: BE YOUR FAMILY’S SAFETY NET
Try not to overthink the ‘what-if’ scenarios – that’s what your emergency fund will take care of. As a non-earning stay-at-home parent, you are now a critical pillar in your family’s economic plans. In the unfortunate event of the family’s main breadwinner losing their job, you’re ready to return to work temporarily or permanently as needed. This new availability to work is in itself a new form of insurance.
FOUR: EXPLORE OTHER WAYS
If resigning outright feels scary, there sure are other choices. If your job largely involves working on a computer, explore the possibility of working remotely with your employer. A part-time role or a four-day workweek could also be an option. You may also initiate a side gig based on your hobbies – I started out as a freelance writer. It doesn’t compensate for my previous role, but it surely helps.
Through freelancing, I still contribute a bit economically to my family, and being your own boss, you can choose to work exactly how much you want.
REFLECTING ON MY CHOICE
Today, I couldn’t be happier with my decision to be a stay at home parent. Initially, I struggled with the idea that I should be earning more, but it dawned upon me that there’s immense value in being a full-time parent. I bring a lot of value to my family, even if it’s not measured in dollars and cents.
I was not there when my daughter took her first steps, but once I quit my job, I became the one who taught her the alphabet or took her on zoo trips. I could bake cupcakes with her on a weekday, just because we felt like it.
Even during the quieter days where there’s nothing particularly exciting planned, I am genuinely delighted because I am there with her. Every day that I get to spend with her, is worth every sacrifice I made. It’s where I want to be.
Have you ever dreamt of being a full-time parent but thought it’s financially daunting? Would you consider cutting down on any particular expenses to make it possible?
